Most romantic relationships started positively at the outset and may have continued to flourish for a good deal of time before difficulties arose. Even with difficulties, couples can repair their relationship, (often with the help of a professional counselor), and once again be happy together.
Sustain & Strengthen
How can committed couples sustain and even strengthen their relationship? The 1st 5 strategies are from Adlerian counselors and authors, Jon Carlson and Len Sperry. Numbers 6 – 10 are additional ones that I also recommend to my couple clients.
- Consistent and regular times to communicate with each other
- Encouragement of each other
- Setting aside time on a regular basis to resolve conflict
- Regular time of having fun together
- Developing specific plans for activities together as a couple, including fun with each other
- Notice and tell you partner of the many instances throughout your day where he or she made your life better
- Process your day together. Process your week together
- Let little stuff go… A lot of what your partner does won’t make sense to you. That’s OK
- Refrain from criticism. Don’t blame. If it is important to discuss, do so with a lot of forethought to minimize defensiveness during your discussion
- Increase your touch-points of affection. Let your person know he or she is special